What is your worst time of day?

Is it the morning? Do you feel stiff from "laying down" and tired, from not necessarily sleeping because of the pain? 


Or, is it the evening? Do you feel pain because you've either pushed to hard, been on your feet all day (out of the necessity of your job), or just because you have Fibro? 


OR, worst of all, is it all day long? Do you lay on the couch or in bed ALL day because of Fibro pain and fatigue and worse, depression. 


I have experienced all of these. It is very discouraging, I know. It can be very depressing and, for me, it actually became frightening. 


Why frightening, you ask? Well, my thought was this; "Am I going to spend the rest of my life, in this particular amount of pain? Will I ever get out of this bed? Off of this couch?" 


To me, that was frightening.....how does it affect you? Actually, there are still days I have that "fright". But they are much, much less than before. 


However, as I mentioned in another post, I am a "Type A", and I "fight" this illness because of the "fear" of becoming or going back to bed/couch. That period of time for me was frightening and during my deepest depression and anxiety. 


The more than I think about that time, the more I wonder if that "laying on the bed or couch" was saying, "Your career is over",or worse, "Your life is over"! I was 35. At 35, I had risen to a level of career and salary that I never thought possible for me. Then, I had lost it to an illness that no one could identify.


No one, at that point, told me I had fibro. I was deeply depressed and I was anxious. But I was also in a huge amount of inexplicable pain, all over my body. So, between 3 or so doctors, the decision was to put me on disability. 


Now, let's discuss this, dear "Fibro friend". Maybe you are lying on the couch or laying in bed every day. 


I am here to tell you that I thought I would NEVER get out of those situations. I was "doomed", or so I thought, to a life of watching daytime TV and trying to get the strength to shower and possibly pick up my daughter from school. The thought of fixing dinner was akin to imagining climbing Mt. Everest. It was a daunting thought that haunted me all day. Once the evening came, I felt I could relax, because, after all, everyone was relaxing at that point. It seemed justified. 


But these thoughts were messages from the "enemy" the "author of lies", or as many of you know him, the devil. 


You can get up from that couch, out of that bed, and you can have a "life". Also, I'll take it one step further. You CAN get away from that wheelchair, that walker and the cane that you feel so attached to at this point in time. 


Fibro's pain can steal your joy, your confidence, your faith and your hope. DO NOT LET IT DO THAT!


I wish I could reach out to every single person on this earth that has Fibro and tell them that there is a life ahead of you. There is a hope and a future for you out of that bed, off of that cane and away form the hopelessness and despair you are feeling. 


Remember yesterday, I said, that it takes just one step in the direction of your dream, and if that dream is what is in God's plan for you, you can move forward with HIS help. 


Dear Fibro friend, ignore the enemy, ignore the negative thoughts in your head. Take one step today. Take one step out in faith. Maybe it's pushing yourself out of that bed and off of that couch. Call a friend, take a walk around your yard, or around your block if you can. Bake a cake for someone. Start writing that book. Start painting or drawing that work of art. Volunteer with a friend. Ask them to pick you up, if you cannot get there yourself. If a friend called me with such a request, I would be thrilled to help! 


Whatever you had as a dream before this "hopelessness" set in, it is still there! Don't let it go!


Fight the enemy and push forward. The pain scares you, I know, but it will not kill you. 


Step out in faith, and God will help you the rest of the way. 


Blessings.......


Mo M.